#115. The Power of Your Words | Proverbs 17–20, Biblical Parenting & Wisdom for Christian Families

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Welcome to The Dwelling Place from Entrusted Ministries.

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I'm Stephanie Hickox.

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Today, we dive into Proverbs 17 through 20

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We'll read a lot about

the power of our words

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And I can't help but think about how

perfectly Jesus, the source of all wisdom,

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Knew when to speak, when to stay silent

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One to issue truth

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And when compassion and mercy were needed

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Let's keep in mind that the

banner over this entire book of

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the Bible is that the fear of the

Lord is the beginning of wisdom.

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And isn't it amazing?

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If you took a look at all of the opinions

available today, if we were to eliminate

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anything that didn't begin with a respect

for our Creator and the source of wisdom,

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it would really narrow down who we

could look to for guidance, wouldn't it?

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Of course, we know that God in His grace

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even offers wisdom to

those who haven't expressed

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submission to Him as their Savior.

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But I'm so proud of you that you

continue to go to the source of life,

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the ultimate problem solver, your maker,

your guide, and your rock to lead you,

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particularly in how you parent your

kids So let's keep hearing how the Lord

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inspired the wisest man who ever lived

to instruct us in all manners of life

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, I'll highlight about 10 verses

from each chapter that I think

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can be pivotal for our training

and our instruction of our kids

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And of course, we'll be seeking

conviction and holiness for

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ourselves the whole time as well

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In chapter 17 Verses one through two.

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Better is a dry morsel with quiet than

a house full of feasting with strife.

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A servant who deals wisely will

rule over a son who acts shamefully,

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and will share the inheritance as

one of the brothers 17:5, whoever

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mocks the poor insults his maker.

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He who is glad at calamity will

not go unpunished 17:9 through 10.

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Whoever covers an offense seeks

love, but he who repeats a

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matter separates close friends.

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A rebuke goes deeper into

a man of understanding than

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a hundred blows into a fool

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17:14, " The beginning of strife

is like letting out water, so quit

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before the quarrel breaks out."

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17:17, A friend loves at all time,

and a brother is born for adversity.

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17:22, A joyful heart is good

medicine, but a crushed spirit dries

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up the bones 17:25, " a foolish

son is a grief to his father and

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bitterness to her who bore him."

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And 17:27 through 28.

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Whoever restrains his words has

knowledge, and he who has a cool

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spirit is a man of understanding.

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Even a fool who keeps

silent is considered wise.

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When he closes his lips,

he is deemed intelligent

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Turning to chapter 18, verses one and two.

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" Whoever isolates himself seeks

his own desire; he breaks out

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against all sound judgment.

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A fool takes no pleasure in understanding,

but only in expressing his opinion."

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18:6 through 7.

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" A fool's lips walk into a fight,

and his mouth invites a beating.

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A fool's mouth is his ruin, and

his lips are a snare to his soul."

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18:12 through 13.

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Before destruction, a man's heart is

haughty, but humility comes before honor.

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If one gives an answer before he hears,

it is his folly and shame: 18:17

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one who states his case first seems right

until the other comes and examines him."

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18:20 through 22.

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From the fruit of a man's

mouth, his stomach is satisfied.

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He is satisfied with

the yield of his lips.

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Death and life are in the power

of the tongue, and those who

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love it will eat its fruits.

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He who finds a wife finds a good

thing and obtains favor from the Lord

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Chapter 19 verse one tells us,

" Better is a poor person who walks

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in his integrity than one who is

crooked in speech and is a fool."

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1911, good sense makes one slow to anger,

and it is his glory to overlook an offense

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19:13 through 14.

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" A foolish son is a ruin to his

father, and a wife's quarreling

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is a continual dripping of rain.

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House and wealth are inherited

from fathers, but a prudent

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wife is from the Lord."

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19:17 through 18.

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Whoever is generous to the

poor lends to the Lord, and He

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will repay him for his deed.

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Discipline your son, for there is hope.

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Do not set your heart

on putting him to death

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19:23, " The fear of the Lord leads to

life, and whoever has it rests satisfied;

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he will not be visited by harm."

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And 17:26, " He who does violence to

his father and chases away his mother

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is a son who brings shame and reproach."

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Chapter 20 verse three.

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It is an honor for a man to

keep aloof from strife, but

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every fool will be quarreling

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Chapter 20 verse 25.

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The purpose in a man's heart is

like deep water, but a man of

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understanding will draw it out

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20 verses 10 through 11.

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Unequal weights and unequal measures are

both alike an abomination to the Lord.

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Even a child makes himself

known by his acts, by whether

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his conduct is pure and upright

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20 verses 17 and 18.

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Bread gained by deceit is sweet

to a man, but afterward his

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mouth will be full of gravel.

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Plans are established by counsel;

by wise guidance wage war

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17:20, "If one curses his father

or his mother, his lamp will be

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put out in utter darkness 2022.

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Do not say, "I will repay evil."

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Wait for the Lord and He will deliver you

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20:25.

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It is a snare to say rashly, "It is holy,"

and to reflect only after making vows

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Did you notice how frequently we

heard that our words can be a snare?

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That they can either make

us look wise or foolish

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I may have mentioned this before, But

one activity I did with one of my sons

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that was struggling with more impulsive

emotions and speech was I bought

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a tube of dollar store toothpaste,

and I gave him about 30 seconds to

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see how much he could empty of it

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As I predicted, he forcefully

squeezed out most of the tube

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But then I told him he would

have 30 seconds to try to put the

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toothpaste back into the tube.

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He looked at me dumbfounded, but

then did his best to attempt it.

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As you'd predict, he wasn't

able to get anything back into

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the tube And I explained to him

that that's how our words work.

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That once we say something, we

can ask for forgiveness, but we

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can't completely take it back

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And that's why the Bible

calls us to be slow to speak

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Because as James tells us The

tongue is as powerful as the rudder

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of a ship And as powerful as a

wildfire, we have to be careful

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and prevent destruction before it happens

once our founder, Betsy Corning, was

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having a conversation with her daughter

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Who was striving to bring her tongue under

the control of the Holy Spirit as well.

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She said, "Mom, I was gonna say

something, but I realized I would have

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a lot of damage control to do if I did.

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so I pictured a garbage can and all the

trash I'd have to pick up if I said what

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I wanted, and I decided it wasn't really

worth it to pick up all that trash."

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We can't see our words, but

they have a great impact.

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And so I appreciate the analogies of

scripture and then these two practical

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applications that can help our kids

Picture the impact of their mouths We

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were also reminded to listen to both

sides of a situation, and any moms who

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have mediated sibling difficulties know

that this is a really important step,

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to be slow to judge what really happened

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I wanna clarify one Proverbs that

might be confusing, and honestly, I

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didn't understand it myself for a while

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Proverbs 17:17 tells us, "A

friend loves at all times, and a

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brother is born for adversity."

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It almost seems like the friend

is more loving than the brother.

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The brother is born for adversity?

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What does this mean?

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That brothers strengthen each other by

fighting with each other all the time?

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It might seem like that, but it means

that a brother sticks by you even in the

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hardest of times your family are the ones

that stand by you through thick and thin.

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But hopefully these sibling friendships

that we're trying to help establish

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are going to be lifelong relationships

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that bless our kids forever.

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Makes me think about Moses and Aaron

and James and John and Peter and Andrew

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In Entrusted, Betsy talks

about that deep waters verse, a

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Plan in the heart of a man is

like deep water, but a man of

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understanding draws it out.

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Betsy explains that as our kids get

older, it might take a little bit more

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unraveling and pulling on the thread

to understand what's really the heart

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of their attitudes and their actions.

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But this is what we're called

to, to really get to the heart

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of our kids Not just to think,

"Oh, they'll grow out of it,"

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But to pursue them and not give

up, because that's how faithful

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the Lord has been with us.

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Mm-hmm.

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So I don't know about you,

but in all this talk about

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honoring the Lord with our words

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I know I have to be a woman

of prayer, to guard my tongue.

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So let's go before Him once again.

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Heavenly Father, it is our privilege

to be called your children.

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As we read that even a child is

known by his conduct, we wanna be

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daughters that bring you glory.

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We ask that the words of our mouths

and the meditations of our heart

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will be pleasing in your sight That

we would be slow to speak and quick

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to listen, and slow to anger and

quick to encourage and understand.

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When we have nothing wise to add, fill

us with your spirit so we have the

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self-control to stay silent Jesus,

you knew how to answer every question

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You were able to end strife

before it started and to see

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to the heart of every person.

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We ask for wisdom about how to

interact with a culture so quick

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to capitalize on every mistake and

cancel those it would disagree with

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Teach us how to speak the truth

in love, not compromising But

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seeing people as those made in your

image and worthy of our attention.

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And we need your self-control

in our homes as well

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prevent us from issuing impatient,

unkind words because we let our

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guards down in the safety of our home.

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Rather, I pray our families would

receive continual blessing from us.

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May they be the ones we're most careful

to affirm and equip, and give us

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Your eyes to speak identity and life

into those You've entrusted us with

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Jesus, we're in awe of your

perfect example once again.

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It's in the power of

your name that we pray.

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Amen